writing process

Typing With Wet Claws: Creative Differences Edition

annabowling 2 Comments

Hello, all. Skye here, for another Feline Friday. Anty and I are having some creative differences this week. There was a topic Anty had suggested for me to write about, but I had to exercise my duties as a mews, and let her know (gently, because this insomnia thing makes her grumpy) that her idea was not very interesting, which it was not. Fridays are my day to blog, and Anty needs to trust me to do the job she asked me to do. At the moment, she is too busy chair dancing to “You’ll Be Back,” from the Broadway musical, Hamilton, to put up much of an argument anyway.

One of the things Anty has come to realize about days when it is difficult to focus is that she probably needs more stimuli. New music is always a good thing, and when it comes highly recommended by people whose opinion Anty values, that is a good sign she may want to have a listen. Anty has not seen Hamilton, but she loves when things people may not think go together -the American Revolution, Broadway, and rapping? What?- do go together, and not only work, but work far better than one would expect.

So far, Anty is only a few songs into Hamilton, but she has already listened to this song five times. No, wait, it is six now. When Anty finds a song that clicks with her, she is going to listen to that a LOT of times in a row, and she does get something new from each listen. I think it has something to do with that whole more layers thing.  I probably should remind Anty that she has her DVD of Idlewild sitting on the DVD shelf in her office, and the combination of Prohibition and hip hop probably is going to jog something loose in her brain. Movies and art journal time are very good for things like that.

Anty has also never seen A Knight’s Tale, but that is on her list, too. She did not see it when it first came out, because it had too much of a modern slant – fighting for the honor of the queen, sure, but to the music of Queen? Uh, no, they did not have Queen in the middle ages, thankyouverymuch. Anty’s  outlook has changed some since then. Now, she is more concerned with the feel of the story world, verisimilitude instead of strict accuracy.  People who lived in other centuries wanted the same things as we do today, but the ways they got them were different.

Now that Anty thinks on it, some of these creative mismatches are the truest of all. Anty loves Elton John and Tim Rice’s version of Aida. Did I mention how one of Anty’s favorite-favorite tropes is star-crossed lovers? Well, it is. It is probably her favorite of all. Anty’s best definition of historical romance, the way she writes it and likes to read it, is a love story worthy of history. She thinks “Written in the Stars” has to be one of the greatest star-crossed lovers songs of all  time. I will give you a spoiler here: Aida and Radames do not get a happy ending (well, not in this life) but in a historical romance novel, they absolutely would. I should amend Anty’s favorite trope as “star-crossed lovers who make it work.” She cannot get enough of that stuff, so she has to make more, of her own.

When Anty finds it difficult to put out story, then it is time for her to take some in, to fill her well. What well needs to be filled can vary from time to time. Sometimes, she needs an infusion of emotion. Other times, it is a grounding in the world of the time of the story. That does not mean facts and dates, which may surprise some. For Anty, it is the way the world felt.

Anty’s favorite research session ever, she thought was going to be a very boring one. She had gone to Old Mystic Seaport, with two other writer friends, who were excited to use the research library, and the people who could help them find the books they needed. When Anty got to the library, she felt like the walls were closing in, and didn’t know how to answer the person who asked how he could help  her find what she needed. She didn’t know what she needed from all those books, so she told her friends she had to take a walk. It was cold and very, very windy, and Anty soaked it all in for hours.

She stood at the shore and watched the tide come in, walked through the completely deserted shipyard and inhaled its scents, picked up shells from the tide pools, and picked the brains of every costumed interpreter she encountered. There were not many of them, because it was really cold and really windy, but Anty did not mind. When she read, in her pamphlet, that an  to talk about what life was like for a house slave in that era, she ran to the right building, so that she would not miss anything. By the time her friends met her for lunch, Anty was full of ideas and stimuli, and couldn’t wait to get all of it into her story. The story she was working on at the time -and hopes to again, in the future- was not set in the time or place of the museum, but that did not matter. What mattered was that they were near the sea, and there were the skeletons of ships, and that was the same centuries and an ocean away.  Getting the feel right, knowing why a certain character loved ships more than anything else, that was what Anty had come for, and she got it.

That all feels vaguely subversive, but Anty likes it that way. It has been said that well behaved women never made history. Maybe the same thing applies to writing historical romance, as well. What is it some humans say, play by the rules, miss all the fun? I am not sure Anty is not having a little too much fun, listening to Hamilton. “Helpless” is playing, and this degree of chair dancing cannot be safe on that kind of chair. That had better be about it for this week, so, until next time, I remain very truly yours,

 

i1035 FW1.1

Until next week…

 
Skye O’Malley Hart-Bowling
(the kitty, not the book)

 

 

 

 

 

Forging Ahead, Reinvention and Learning to Dig

annabowling Leave a comment

We never end up with the book we began writing. Characters twist it and turn it until they get the life that is perfect for them. A good writer won’t waste their time arguing with the characters they create…It is almost always a waste of time and people tend to stare when you do!

– C.K. Webb

 

I’ve noticed, lately, that I often get to the keyboard and find I’m not doing what I intended to do. Like with this blog, today. I’d intended to write this entry (well, not this entry, obviously, because today hadn’t happened yet yesterday) on the regularly scheduled Wednesday, because routine and discipline and all the rest of that good serious writer stuff. I did not write yesterday’s entry because I’d gone two and a half nights with no sleep, and my brain and body were so depleted that I couldn’t focus.  (Apart from Pinterest, but we’re talking writing here.)

Originally I’d planned to make this a video entry, but A) forgot about that until I’d already set up for the afternoon at the coffee shop (video entries are best not made in public) and B) my hair and I could not reach an agreement about what we were doing that particular day, apart from a five minute span around breakfast time. I’d planned to still make this a video entry today, but nobody wants to see me with wet hair (trying my best not to touch it while it air dries with product in, because beachy waves, dagnabit, or at least that’s the theory we are testing today.)

There’s a reason I frequently trot out K.A. Mitchell’s advice to A) open the file, and B) change your seat. That’s because they work. So, when I sat in front of the screen this morning, my brain a muddle, that became a signal that it’s time to mix things up. When I retired the previous version of Typing With Wet Nails and started this new one, I’d come to a point where I couldn’t do the old blog any longer. Finding a new clip for Happy Dance Friday became a chore, and Saturday at the Movies, instead of being fun, made my head hurt. So, it had to stop. Clean sweep.

After clean sweep comes more layers. I’d been to a wonderful workshop by Jeanette Grey on making websites with WordPress, and figured it couldn’t hurt. What to put in it? What’s really in my heart and head. That was, and is, talking about the whole writing experience. I love seeing other writers showing off covers and talking about new releases and awards and reviews, and, trust me, I will be one of them in good time, but then there’s the other side of the matter.

There are all those notebooks I have, months of them, filled with venting about how hard writing had become, how arduous it was to get words on the page, how I despaired of ever fitting into the market, how, maybe, I missed my chance and was doomed to spend the rest of my life (a pretty darned long time, I would hope) as someone who could have been a writer. The voice of an acquaintance at a mutual friend’s book launch haunted me. “I knew the author when I used to write,” she said to another guest, and laughed. I didn’t laugh. I shuddered,

Used to write. I can’t think of more horrifying words. (Okay, genocide, fascism, polyester; but stick with me here.) I can’t not-write, and so the writing is worth the struggles. One of my favorite quotes is a Japanese proverb that says “fall down five times, get up six.” That resonates with me, and resonates deeply. In the last couple of days, two writers of my acquaintance have posted about their own difficulties in keeping motivated. I want to let that marinate before I expound (besides this, that is) because I think this is a fairly common malady.

There are a million reasons to quit, but all of them together don’t overpower the one reason to keep at it. I have to write, the same as I have to breathe. There is no off switch for this relentless pull into the story world. That, for me, my natural habitat is historical romance, that, too is organic. The market will change. My need to tell my stories won’t. Logic alone says keep going, and so I do. Muscles grow stronger with exercise, so I keep at it. Fingers on keys, pen on paper, show up, open the file (or notebook.)

When that’s not enough, time to change my seat, change direction. Change my wallpaper. Play different music. Put some goop in my hair. Browse the library stacks. Trust that what I need to go forward is out there, and, if I look for it, remain open to it, things will click. Sometimes that takes a while, and sometimes, it happens in an instant.

With fiction, I’ve come back around to something, I used to do when I’d only first started. Let the characters lead. I’d wanted Hero, for example, in Her Last First Kiss, to be blond and a musician. When he actually showed up, he had red hair and wanted to play with my pens. I tried wooing him back in line by playing the music that was supposed to be his passion; he responded by picking up one of my fountain pens and doodling. Okay, fine. Heroine was supposed to play the pianoforte to relieve stress. Nope. She likes guns.

This brings to mind certain questions- when did all that start? Why that interest? What are you doing with my pens, Hero? These things generally take me away from what I’d intended, but usually to a better place, and I am okay with that.

The good thing about characters being stubborn like this, when they tell me I’ve got it wrong, means that they are real and alive within their world and they are going to  help me tell their story, rather than making me do all the work completely by myself.  I like to think we make a pretty good team.

 

Monday Morning Brain Dump, With Notebooks

annabowling Leave a comment

Urgh. Monday morning again. I have shown up at the keyboard, which is an achievement when I’m coming off another night of no sleep. I hate insomnia. Brain races a million miles an hour, but will it focus on something useful, like the WIP? Nope. Not a chance on that one. Late night Pinterest pinning sprees are about as close as I get on that front.

Most recently, I started my Pen and Paper board, which is here. Not enough caffeine in the world to figure out why my computer says I can’t share the screencap I took of my own Pinterest page with myself, so click on the link to see all the pretties. Pens and notebooks, that’s it.

Since I’ve become more serious about my interest in notebooks, I’ve been doing more research, and my wish list is growing. Moleskines are still my workhorse, supplemented by Picadilly and Markings -I really need to do a comparison post/video on those soon- but I have found I’m not as immune as I used to be for the other brands out there.

The newest “must try this or a part of myself will forever mourn” item is this. Leuchtturm 1917 A5 Medium hardcover notebook in berry, with lined pages. Need. I love that the pages come pre-numbered. I love the color, which goes perfectly with my laptop. I honestly can’t tell if the pages are white or ivory. I strongly prefer ivory, but if this paper takes fountain pen ink as well as I’ve heard it does, I am willing to make an exception. I also have a strong thirst for a large Moleskine Volant, a format I hated in the 3×5 size, love in the mini, and now want to revisit in my preferred size, 5×8. Gray is first choice for color, purple second, though there are new colors that look interesting, too.  The books may have to go into a leather cover, because the plastic feel of the books themselves feels off to me, but perforated pages all the way through? I have to give that a try. Maybe blank pages, rather than lined, but lined might be all right also.

There are actually a lot of notebooks I haven’t tried yet, and the whole fountain pen world? Only dipping my toes into that. Which reminds me, I’ve never even held a dip pen, but the mere thought of that makes me feel closer already to the eighteenth century people currently taking up space in my head. Hero and his letterbox and his sketches, (I seriously cannot draw worth beans, and I’d originally wanted him to be a violinist – I also cannot play the violin- but nope, he went right for pen and ink, so here we are) and Heroine and her ledgers (that, I can get. Keeping track of stuff is important) and my natural affinity for longhand make this an appropriate pastime.

Certain notebooks work for certain things, I’ve found since I’ve become serious about the habit, and no, any old notebook won’t do. There was a time when I thought that was the case, and I was wasting time and money and mental energy by using pretty paper (or making plain paper pretty) but I’ve found that’s not the case. It’s a natural and needed part of my process. Using notebooks has taught me a lot about the way I write fiction. Slap something on the page, anything, and get it moving. If I don’t like what’s down there, I can change it. I can rip it out. I can tape it together. I can cover it. I do not have to be perfect on the first try, which is a misunderstanding I’d been laboring under for longer than I care to admit, even here.

It’s okay to say, “this isn’t working. I’m going to try something else.” The thoughts, feelings, images, words, stories, all of the above, that I want for project X may not come at all on lined paper, but move to dot grid and work in boxes rather than paragraphs and :angels sing: there we go. Pen and paper matter. An old Japanese proverb says that a poor workman blames his tools, and there is some truth to that, but finding the right tool can make the job all that much easier.

 

 

 

 

 

Typing With Wet Claws: Scribbling Furiously Edition

annabowling Leave a comment

Hello, all. Skye here, for another Feline Friday. I am pawing it once again in regard to topic, because Anty is hard at work on Her Last First Kiss. Now that she knows she has an assignment to turn in to Miss N on Tuesday, she is not about to let anything stop her. This can be both a good and a bad thing.

The good thing is that a writing Anty is a happy Anty. She knows where this book is going, and she has the new opening roughed out, so it is now time to smooth that out and show it to an actual other writer human, in person. A writing Anty with a deadline is also a very focused Anty. When Anty does not have a tight focus, she will try and write in the living room, because that is where the glowy box is when she gets up in the morning. The problem there is that the rest of the family has access to the living room, because it is for everybody, not only for Anty, and they want to use the room, too. Since Anty is focused, she is doing more of her at-home work in the office.

2016-01-22 12.29.37_resized

The view from Anty’s seat

 

That room still needs a lot of work. You can probably see the big glowy box screen behind the pink glowy box. That screen goes with a glowy box that stays on the desk (well, next to it) but is too old to run the Internet or, more importantly, Sims. Anty is figuring out how to get a better big glowy box in there, but for now, Anty brings the pink glowy box into the office in the morning, makes a list of what she has to get done, and then she will come out when it is lunchtime. Specifically my lunchtime.  Until then, she can put all her attention on the book, stick those pink things in her ears, so only she can hear her music, and get to work. What comes out of Anty’s head at first is very rough, and needs several passes before she can show it to anybody. With this scene, she grumbles a lot about too much happening inside Heroine’s head. Even I think she is going to have to fix that, and I am a kitty, so I can only imagine what other humans would have to say.

Besides the first scene, the other thing Anty has to do is make a list of all the characters in her book. When they make their first appearance in a scene, Anty has to write their name down on a separate paper (probably in a notebook, or copy it to a notebook from the scratch paper) and then write who they are and what their relationship is to the other characters. She can also put anything else she wants about the characters in that description, but that brings her to a place where she does not want to go.

20160122_105837~3

I do not think I like overthinking.

 

I am talking about overthinking. Anty is really, really, really good at overthinking. She can think about one thing so much that she gets paralyzed in her thoughts and cannot go any farther on that topic. That has meant some miscarried stories in the past. She does not want to go that way with this book, so she is trying new things to make sure that does not happen again.

One of those things is writing her first-first pages in present tense. For example:

Skye sleeps in the sunbeam.

Rather than:

Skye slept in the sunbeam.

That way, for Anty, the story is something that is happening now, and she can alter it as she goes, rather than something that has already happened, and is set in stone. She did not know she was thinking that way until she talked with some other writer friends, and started reading books for almost-grown humans. Those are sometimes written in present tense, and it is a good way for her to get her brain working and moving forward. It lets her take in more of the scene that is in the movie in her head if it is happening “now,” so it is like noticing rather than remembering.

Once she has that on the page, then she can go back and revise what she has already written. She can put the present tense into past, and see if she can get things out of characters’ heads and into action or dialogue. That part can make her edge over to the crabby side, but it is all for a good cause. She will be better once she has the revisions made and can get some feedback.

Anty needs the computer back, because it is story time, so that is about it for this week. Until next time, I remain very truly yours,

i1035 FW1.1

Until next week…

Skye O’Malley Hart-Bowling
(the kitty, not the book)

Typing With Wet Claws: Story Brain Edition

annabowling Leave a comment

Hello, all. Skye here, for another Feline Friday. Anty did not tell me what to write about today, so I am going to have to wing it, or, in my case, paw it. I do not have any wings, because I am a kitty; only paws. I use them for walking.  Only birdies have wings. Also bats, and some insects. Maybe also Pegasus (I do not know the plural form of that word, but it is a horsey with wings. I am not sure if they are real or fictional, but I do not want to find out by meeting one. They sound scary.)  I think Anty letting me say whatever I want today shows a great deal of trust. I will try to show her she did the right thing.

Most of this week can be divided into domestic tornado management and writing. Anty also found time to get to the library, along with Mama, and bring home a bunch of books. Eight of them, which is a lot, even though Anty says it is a reasonable amount. These are the books:

Anty picked them all. Mama did not find any books she especially wanted to read, but she wants to read some of the books Anty picked, when Anty is done reading them. So far, Anty is close to mostly through one. One. Anty needs more reading time. I would suggest that Anty try using some of the awake-in-the-middle-of-the-night time for reading, but the last time I did that, she looked at me like this:

ROBINDAGGERS - WIN_20150811_110539

That is not something I want to go through again, so that was the last time I will make that suggestion. Anty is doing laundry at least once tomorrow, so that is two hours of potential reading time right there. If it does not turn into writing time, that is. Which it might.  One important thing to know if you have a writer in your life is that pretty much any time can turn into writing time. That comes with the territory, and does not only happen when they are in front of a computer or have a notebook at hand (although Anty usually does have at least one notebook within reach.) Many writers, including my Anty, do not have an off switch. Sometimes, it would be useful if they did, but they do not. At least mine does not.

We do not have any pictures of the Anty Has Story Brain look, and that is probably a good thing. Mama and Uncle and I have learned to recognize it, though, and I think some of the humans who work at the coffee house. Twice, this week, Anty has had a coffee house human remind her that her tea is right in front of her and she can sit down now.  Some of them know it because they are writers, too, and give the gentle prompt as a matter of professional courtesy. The best way I can describe that look is sort of blank, staring off into some place that is not there.  Maybe I should say it is something non-writers cannot see, because merely because something happens inside a writer’s mind does not mean it is not real. Making things in their heads become real is a big part of writers’ jobs, so it is no surprise that it happens when it happens. Sometimes, often in the car, Mama will notice Anty is too quiet, and ask “are you writing?” Almost always, Anty says that she is. Once, Mama asked, “How are Hero and Heroine?” Anty laughed, because that was where her story brain had gone.

2016-01-15 14.35.56_resized

a very small portion of story brain

 

Anty says that, at least for her, story brain is a sign that she is on the right track, and the characters are doing their parts. It is like a movie in her head that plays itself and she has to get it all down. Maybe it is somewhat like recapping TV shows, except that there is no remote to pause things and she has to do it all in her head. I think the inside of Anty’s head is probably very messy, filled with pictures and sounds and bits of movies and snippets of songs, remembered smells and parts of ideas that started out as something else, but took on their own form after they swam around with all the other stuff for a while. I can imagine it is very easy to get lost in there at times, and that is why it takes Anty a little while to come back from it when she has to do things like go to the grocery store or figure out where Uncle’s sweater went.

Story brain is a lot better than lack-of-story-brain. Anty wrestled with that for a long while, and it was not pretty.  I am not sure that story brain is that much prettier, as her office looks like a tornado hit it. More books are coming out of boxes and going into her bookshelves, moving around so books she wants easiest access to, like the library haul, above, are the ones she can get to fastest, and books she never ever looks at can get ready to go to new homes. Right now, she needs books that will help  keep her moving forward in telling Hero and Heroine’s story, and those that don’t, need to go away. She says I can share pictures when she gets things neat again, but not right now.

Right now, Anty needs the computer back so that she can write more about Hero and Heroine, so that is about it for this week. Until next time, I remain very truly yours,

i1035 FW1.1

Until next week…

Skye O’Malley Hart-Bowling
(the kitty, not the book)

Backing Up and Moving Ahead

annabowling Leave a comment

“You do what you can for as long as you can, and when you finally can’t, you do the next best thing. You back up but you don’t give up.”
–Chuck Yeager

 

Another Monday, another blog entry. Not feeling it today, but discipline and practice are both important, and I find that putting order to chaos satisfies me, so here I am. Morning spent doing housework with help of Housemate. This often consists of her sitting there and letting me chatter at her, as it was today, with me sitting cross-legged on the floor, the box fan in front of me, as I took apart the covers both front and back and cleaned that sucker with grapefruit-scented all purpose cleaner and paper towels. Odds are we aren’t going to be needing that fan for a while, as furnace keeps us toasty warm, and it is January, after all. So, into the newly reorganized closet for our biggest fan. I promise I only do this to mechanical fans, not readers. No reverse Misery-ing here, and, besides, readers are good to have around during all seasons.

The great Christmas ornament harvest of 2016 went well this morning. Good crop, and we hope for an even better return next year. As much as I love the whole process of decorating for Christmas, and will inspect the placement of garland and ornaments (the fact that we use a pre-lit tree is probably best for all involved, lest I get nitpicky about light placement as well; I have in the past.) taking things down is a much quicker and more ruthless process. Down come the lights, coiled, tied, boxed. I pluck ornaments from the tree like ripened fruit, in a matter of seconds. It’s all over in a handful of minutes. This year’s crop is planted in the storage boxes, labeled, and can now germinate for next year. Maybe next year will be the year I finally go for a second tree, which would have black and white ornaments only. Supplemental tree, not replacing the traditional one; I have to have my tradition.

20160111_100740-1_resized

When I’m at a loss for what to blog about, my guiding phrases of “clean sweep” and “more layers” push me in the right direction. Taking down the Christmas décor and making better use of the closet space fits both of those criteria, as does yesterday’s library trip. Yesterday was a tough day, tired, emotionally drained and frazzled at the same time, and I strode through the library doors with one specific purpose in mind. I was going to grab an armful of romance novels.

I’ve written, recently, about how it’s been difficult for me to read a lot of more newly produced work (part of this, I am certain, is due to my reluctance to jump into the middle of a series of linked books; have to start at the beginning, for me, and there are a lot of series.) This time, I knew what I needed; romance. Historical romance. That’s my reading and my writing home. No matter what happens between Once Upon a Time and Happily Ever After, I know I am going to get that Happily Ever After, so pretty much anything is fair game in between those points. I did end up plucking a current release from the shelves, Cold-Hearted Rake, by Lisa Kleypas, which I started reading as soon as I got home.

12096457_1105577866148910_5999726958156898009_n

That’s the whole haul, for those who were curious. I’d gone with a vague hope I might find one of the Russian-related historicals on my list (and did, with Forever in Your Embrace) and fingers crossed for a Georgian (but not Regency) setting (When You Wish Upon a Duke delivers on that front) but, apart from that, nothing more specific than wanting a good grounding in my favorite genre. Carla Kelly always delivers on the emotional impact, so that was enough to put the book in my hand, and it had been a while since I’d read a good time travel, so The Last Cavalier fit that bill. If I could hit the snooze button on the calendar so I could snuggle beneath my fuzzy duck blankey and read them all, with endless cups of tea at hand, I think, at this point, I would.

Life, unfortunately, doesn’t work that way, but I can make sure I get some pages read every day, the same way I make time for my morning pages and have to at least touch one of the current fiction projects every day. As K.A. Mitchell, whose wonderful workshop on character relations this past Saturday gave me even more layers to slather on Her Last First Kiss, has said, open the file and change your seat. I have to open the file, or open the notebook. When I do, well, it’s right there. I have a pen in my hand, or the keyboard is right there, too (usually both, in most cases; that’s how my brain works best) and who would it hurt if I took a poke or two at things, hm?

Thanks to a talk with a new writing friend, who listened to me whinge about how hard it’s been to find where I should (note that should, there) including roundabout analogies and a diagram drawn on a napkin with rollerball ink, I am getting the chance to do both the clean sweep and more layers things at one with Her Last First Kiss. What, she asked, was the moment that changed my heroine’s life forever? What permanently took her off the path she always thought she was going to walk in life? Huh. Well. Had to think about that one, and then the answer came out all on its own. When her father left.

Sure, she was seven then, and I didn’t want to start that far back, but darned if the whole scene didn’t play itself out on my walk back home from that meeting. I sat down at my secretary desk, with notebook and fountain pen, and out flowed the whole thing. I didn’t have to yank any teeth. Didn’t have to force anything. Huh. I…remember how to do that. Don’t write a book. Tell the story. Remember back when I didn’t know all the rules, but blithely wrote down the movie in my head? Yeah, that.

Clean sweep. More layers. Easy enough when I don’t think about it.

 

Treasure Box

annabowling Leave a comment

We’re a few days into what’s usually my favorite week of the year, that tucked-away week between Christmas and New Year’s. Jury is still out on this year’s version. Normally, going to the Laundromat is a lovely pocket of time, and doing so during my tucked-away week would make it doubly so. This time? Not so much.

We’ll start with the fact that I had to put laundry in and take it out of four machines before hitting one that would actually h0ld everything and did not have any mystery detergent residue that would play havoc with sensitive skin. Add in a quick dash back home to collect more quarters, because I ended up using the industrial sized washer. On the plus side, clean bedding.  On the minus side, there was the person who asked me if I was taking the week off, and, when I said that was my plan, answered that they didn’t think that was possible. Since I work for myself, my whole life is apparently “relaxing” and I do whatever I want, whenever I want. Yeah, not the way it works, person. Seriously not. Add in another unwanted interaction,  and I was in a foul mood by the time I got home.

I’m not sure what drew me to the small cardboard box in the hallway closet, but I figured I could use some diversion. I knew it had some of my dad’s art supplies -now my art supplies- in it, and art time is usually a good de-grumper. I noticed the paint first, four small tubes of watercolors. Some pencils, of varying vintage and purpose, some tools that look like they’re for carving clay (can check with a friend whose husband is a sculptor) and then there was the pen. Which I may want to call The Pen.

 

1933832_1097379250302105_3317754414700714080_n (2)

Rather plain at first sight, black cap and silvery barrel, but still a pen. I took the cap off.  Either a fountain pen or dip pen, though I can’t see where I could get the pen apart to check for where I’d refill if it’s a fountain pen. That’s when I examined the nib and found the words that caught my attention. Mont Blanc. Huh wuh? That’s a good pen, isn’t it? Quick check online and my suspicions were confirmed.

White snowflakey/star thing is present on top of cap and bottom of barrel, as well as the clip. “Mont Blanc” is on the otherwise plain nib, and “Mont Blanc Germany” is on the cap, below the clip. I’m not finding what model this is, and not sure where/how to continue the search, but when a fabulous pen falls into my lap, I’m going to take it. Whatever ink may have been in there at one time is completely gone now, and if it’s a dip pen (though I don’t see any evidence of Mont Blanc making any dip pens) then that would explain the lack of ink. This is going to require more investigation. The closest Mont Blanc store I can locate is in White Plains, which is a road trip in itself, but Westchester and tracking down the identity of a super cool pen? This may need to happen.

 

The paints, I think I like on their own rather than together, but this is only my smush them on the page and see what they do stage, so it doesn’t count. That’s still something hard to accept, that I can put something on a page, whether words or colors or shapes, and it doesn’t have to, and as a matter of fact, probably won’t be perfect the first time around, but treasure boxes like these are helping me deal with that.

It’s highly unlikely that I’m going to haul a box out of the storage unit and find it’s full of words, characters, plots, etc (apart from old manuscripts or boxes of books) but that same spirit of playing around, tossing something on the page and seeing what it does -What  color is this, really? What mark does this make? What happens if I get this wet? Can I scratch into it for some texture?- that can only infuse new life. Time to take a few risks again and see what comes out. There may not be gesso for the written page, but there is a delete key. First drafts are meant to be messy, same as laying down a background color; that’s only the base. Many more layers are yet to come before the finished product is ready to be seen.

 

Hypercritical Gremlin Interview, Part One

annabowling 3 Comments

Welp, four more days until Christmas, not nearly ready, but I did watch A Charlie Brown Christmas last night, so that’s a start. By Real Life Romance Hero’s and my reckoning, we have gone over one solid month with somebody in our family sick. Not always the same person, thankfully -there were a few days there where I was the healthy one- but mostly it’s been me, which is weird, because I am the Energizer Bunny, and tend to keep on going, no matter what. Which may explain things right there. Sometimes, when the brain won’t allow for a break, the body overrules and takes what it needs.

BUT IF YOU’RE SO BUSY, WHY AREN’T YOU RICH, OR AT LEAST HAVE A WHOLE BUNCH OF NEW RELEASES, YOU SLACKER?

That would be the voice of my hypercritical gremlins. They, along with my characters, live in my head (though in a much dodgier neighborhood) and are a talkative bunch. They have extremely high standards, keep excellent track of what everybody else is doing, and offer advice unsolicited. Today, they get blog space, because “blog entry” is next on my list, and I am determined to get everyday things out of the way so I can concentrate on Christmas preparations.

ALSO, YOU WANT TO PLAY SIMS.

:ahem: Yes, yes, I do. I assume you guys have a problem with that.

OF COURSE! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY THOUSANDS OF  WORDS YOU COULD POUND OUT IN THE TIME IT TAKES YOU TO PUT IN ALL THOSE FRIVOLOUS THINGS LIKE MODS AND CUSTOM CONTENT?

Probably not many, because I don’t work that way at this stage of the game, but I do usually have a legal pad next to my computer and jot down ideas and dialogue while I play. I find it relaxing.

SO YOU ADMIT YOU’RE A LAZY SLACKER!

No, I admit that I am finding what works for me. Sometimes, I’ve sketched out entire scenes while doing that or cracked character issues that had me puzzled before. Do you guys always shout everything?

YES!

Do you always shout it in unison?

YES! ! ALSO, YOU ARE BAD AND STUPID AND IRRELEVANT FOR NOT SEEING THE NEW STAR WARS. OR EVEN PLANNING TO SEE IT.

If Real Life Romance Hero wants to see it for date night, I’ll go with him, but I’m more of a Merchant-Ivory girl, when left to my own devices.

YOU DO KNOW ONE OF THEM IS DEAD, RIGHT? THERE WILL NEVER BE A NEW MERCHANT-IVORY PRODUCTION. ALSO, MOST HISTORICAL MOVIES ARE FICTIONALIZED BIOGRAPHIES THESE DAYS BECAUSE NOBODY WANTS OR CAN RELATE TO OLD TIMEY DRAMAS, YOU RELIC. HAVE YOU SEEN THE SALES OF HISTORICAL VERSUS CONTEMPORARY ROMANCES THESE DAYS? WRITE WHAT SELLS.

:drinks tea: Ah, the bunny trails. Okay, Richard Curtis, then. I saw About Time this weekend, and it was wonderful. Emotionally effective, intimate, made me cry more than once, and reminded me why I write romance, though it isn’t a romance (but there is a romance in it.) Also, Bill Nighy can do no wrong. He seriously can’t, at least acting-wise, though I am certain he has hypercritical gremlins of his own, who would tell me otherwise.

HE DOES. WE FOLLOW THEM ON TWITTER.

Gremlins are on Twitter?

GREMLIN TWITTER, WHERE WE CAN TALK ABOUT ALL YOU TWITS. WE NOTICE YOU DIDN’T ANSWER US ABOUT THE HISTORICAL VS CONTEMPORARY THING.

That’s because I am not having that conversation.

:HUFF: OH ALL RIGHT. THEN AT LEAST WRITE REGENCY. EVERYBODY LOVES REGENCY.

That’s not true.

YES IT IS!

No, it’s not. Regency is a very popular setting, yes, but that doesn’t mean it’s the only one out there, or that I am suited to write in it. Remember all that time I spent trying to write Regency already?

:CLINK GLASSES AND HIGH FIVES: GOOD TIMES!

No, not good times.

GOOD TIMES FOR US! WE ESPECIALLY LIKED ALL THE CRYING AND HEADACHES.

I didn’t.

WE KNOW! THAT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE AN OVERSENSITVE WUSS.

Really? You’re going there? I thought you had better ammunition than that.

EXACTLY WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?

Mostly, that you must not know me very well.

WE’VE BEEN LIVING IN YOUR HEAD SINCE YO UKNEW YOU HAD ONE. MAYBE BEFORE.

So? Look, I get that you guys probably aren’t moving out, anytime soon. You like the décor –

THERE COULD BE MORE ART ON THE WALLS. REMEMBER THAT TIME YOU SOLD ONE OF YOUR PURSES AND THE PERSON SAID YOUR HOUSE MUST LOOK AMAZING WITH ALL YOUR ART ON THE WALLS, AND YOU WERE ALL CRINGEY BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE ANY UP? NOTE WE USED PRESENT TENSE, AHEM.

–as I was saying, you mostly like the décor, the food is good, and you like petting my bookshelves when you think I’m not looking–

ALSO GOING THROUGH YOUR OLD PRINTOUTS AND FINDING GRAMMATICAL ERRORS. REALLY HAD A THING FOR GERUNDS THERE IN THE LATE NINETIES, DIDN’T YOU?

Okay, you guys need a hobby. Playing Sims is fun.

YOU DO KNOW THAT’S ONLY PIXELATED BARBIES, RIGHT?

I do know that the original game was pitched as a virtual dollhouse simulator, so what’s your point?

THAT YOU ARE CHILDISH.

Obviously, you haven’t been paying attention to my saved games, or any of my stories.

THANKS FOR THE REMINDER! YOU’RE NOT NICE, EITHER. WHAT ARE PEOPLE GOING TO THINK ABOUT YOU IF YOU HAVE CHARACTERS DO THINGS LIKE YOU DO?

Hopefully, that I can tell an emotionally compelling story. Are you guys about done now?

NOT EVEN CLOSE.

In that case, we’ll have to continue this conversation later, because it’s time for me to move along with my day. Any parting comments for this session?

YES. YOUR ART JOURNALING IS AMATEURISH AT BEST AND NOBODY WANTS TO SEE IT. COVER REVEALS, THAT’S WHAT READERS LIKE. ALSO, YOUR DISLIKE OF THE WORD, ‘JOURNAL’ MEANS YOU ARE NOT A REAL WRITER, IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING.

Actually, I wasn’t, but thanks for sharing your opinion. I need to go write and send off an invoice now, so we’re done for the day.

FINE. WE’RE GOING TO HANG OUT HERE AND PICK ON YOUR READING CHOICES.

As long as you do it quietly, knock yourselves out.

 

 

 

 

Typing With Wet Claws: Christmas Crunch Time Edition

annabowling 2 Comments

Hello, all. Skye here, for my regularly scheduled Feline Friday. Anty is feeling much better, but that also means she is very busy, because it is now one week until Christmas. Anty loves Christmas. Normally, she will spend the whole month between Thanksgiving and Christmas, getting ready for her favorite holiday. This year, she spent it being sick, or taking care of sick humans, or taking care of sick humans while being sick. That does not sound like a lot of fun, but some of the smells were very interesting. Well, probably only for a kitty. The humans are fond of a thing called Febreeze.

With only a week to actually get ready, Anty is winding up to go into high gear. First comes the pretending she doesn’t care and we can skip the whole thing at this point stage. (That is never going to happen, trust me.) Then there is the “there is no way we can do this” stage. That is a little scary, because I am used to being the most panicky one in the house and that is not always true during this stage, but then the next stage kicks in, and everything falls into place and she makes it happen after all. Sometimes it is fancy, and sometimes it is intimate. Uncle says that means small. I think Anty doesn’t much care; she likes Christmas, period.

There is wrapping to do, and mailing, and Mama is going to help Grandma get ready, and have their own celebration back where we used to live. Presents are starting to come together. I think I am getting cat food. I hope I am getting cat food. I love cat food. My humans know that my favorite toy is crumpled paper. Very occasionally, I will bat my catnip mousie (but I do not care about the catnip) if one of my humans throws it while I am already playful, but, really, I’m all about paper when it comes to toys. I am thinking about getting everybody mice.

What? Oh. Sorry. My mistake. I got all excited about Christmas (Anty will probably catch up with me soon) and forgot I am supposed to talk about Anty’s writing things first. Something big happened on The Big Bang Theory last night, and Anty is recapping it all at Heroes and Heartbreakers. It is here, and it looks like this.

SHAMY

This episode was about, um, something grownups do that also happens in romance novels, but it was also about getting expectations built up so much that it can affect the actual experience. This applies to Anty and Christmas, and to Anty and writing. Will she do something wrong? Will she miss out on something good? Is there something she could have done better? What if she does the wrong thing, and, because of that, it’s not fun for anybody? It is times like that when I am glad Anty is too big to fit under the bed (the space down there is kitty sized, not human sized.) because she might seriously consider hunkering down there with me sometimes.

As much as I would like to have the time with her, that is not how writing books work. If I, who am a kitty, know that, then an actual writer human should know that, too, but sometimes, she needs a reminder. Also, usually a notebook and a pen, because then she will want to play with them. Tea usually helps, and, this time of year, seasonally appropriate treats. Anty is especially fond of red and green gumdrops and cheese and crackers. (The cheese and crackers do not need to be red and green, in case you were wondering. Only the gumdrops. The cheese could even be blue. Anty likes it when the cheese is blue. Full of holes is good, too.)  Talking with writer friends definitely helps, and, most of all, (sometimes scariest of all) actually writing.

Oddly enough, Anty has not yet written a Christmas story. Maybe she will have to give that a try. If she starts now, she could be ready for next year. She says she needs to finish her current projects first, but I remember this is before she’s watched Love Actually, The Holiday, or Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol even once this year. The bug could still hit.

It is almost time for Anty to go meet a writer friend, so that is about it for now. I may have to fill in for Anty again if Christmas preparations (or writing) take up much more of her time this week, so maybe we will see each other before next week. Until then, I remain very truly  yours,

i1035 FW1.1

Until next week…

Skye O’Malley Hart-Bowling
(the kitty, not the book)

 

Past Present Future

annabowling 2 Comments

 How I Thought It Was Going To Go:

That magnum opus I pounded out on an electronic typewriter, in my dad’s living room, my old bedroom, and my first college dorm room, heavily reminiscent of the Bertrice Small epics I still adore, complete with fictional island nation, slaved over for years, was supposed to be The One. I had a chance to send the first three chapters to a big name editor, and I did. I remember sitting on the couch of Real Life Romance Hero’s and my first apartment, the letter in my hands, unopened, knowing that this would change my life forever. It did, but not the way I had expected.

Not enough action, nothing important happened, something else, something else, something else, probably something positive in there, but danged if I can remember any of it all these years later.  What was supposed to happen was that Big Name Editor was supposed to love this story as much as I did, want the whole thing, throw a big bunch of money at me and ask for more books. Never mind that I had no idea what those books were going to be, because that one was my everything at the time.  What I do remember is the crushing disappointment, the “proof” that I couldn’t do what I wanted to do more than anything else in the world. Totally skipped over the “send me something else” part, partly because I was that crushed, and partly because I didn’t have anything else at the time. This was meant to be the one that flung open the doors and got the party started. Surely, then, everything would come easy after that.

What Actually Happened:

I went into retail. The book went into the briefcase a family friend gave me for my high school graduation, and then into the back of a closet, eventually into a storage unit. I stumbled onto the path of retail management, but when the district supervisor called me in for a talk, to ask about where I wanted to be in five years, I said “writing.” What? I didn’t want to manage my own store? Umm, okay, I guess, but mostly writing. I ended up as assistant manager at that store, and I discovered fan fiction, where I wrote. A lot. Where I learned a lot through that writing. Where I made friends who also wrote. We taught each other. We experimented. Belly flopped. Blinked in astonishment when readers asked for more. Provided more. Learned how to hawk our wares at appropriate venues, used the heck out of the USPS to stay in touch, fumbled through the early days of the Internet together, and, sometimes, met in person.

Through one of those meetings, I found a local writer’s group and was invited to join. I did. Week after week, we met and wrote to prompts, in timed exercises. One of those clicked, and kept going, eventually becoming My Outcast Heart. My first shot at a historical romance since that book where nothing happened. I queried Awe-Struck Publishing, sent in a partial, and sent in the whole thing when asked. Less than a week later, I got The Email. A real, live publisher wanted to buy my book! Um, yes, please. Then when one of the editors started his own boutique publisher and asked me for more, I sent more. I wrote two novellas and another novel, and all went out into the world and found homes.

Then life happened. I became caregiver to three relatives at once. Two passed away, while the other and I learned to manage the conditions newly discovered. There were matters to settle, a move to be made. My own depression was in there somewhere, along with some anxiety, and more miscarried manuscripts than I care to count. Not my favorite time, and sure, I wish I’d done some things differently. Sold  a few books, that would have been nice, but I’ve written articles and blog posts and not going to lie, I’m proud of those. I kept writing books. Not all of them made it, and that’s probably a good thing, but I kept on going, finding things that didn’t work and looking for things that would.

How It Goes From Here:

You’re asking me? This is the person who cried when the survey showed up in her mailbox. The one who grumped about not wanting to go to the meeting, but I had to because I was part of it. Everybody else is more successful than me and what right do I have to walk in the midst of them, so leave me here in my pile of sludge to die. Which is A) pretty much what it felt like, and, B) shines a light on how  much I want this.  Seeing as how I did tick a few boxes, I think I’m doing okay.

I’m still here. I’m still writing. I’ve been getting some good rejections on a novella, and “loved the voice and characters, but…” is a far sight better than “nothing happens.” I got a workshop I love out of lessons learned from all the fanfic I wrote and edited in those post-rejection days (which, to be honest, were all historical romances in disguise anyway) and, as my mother told me often, the year I broke my right arm (and, disappointingly, did not learn how to become completely ambidextrous during the healing process) broken bones heal stronger.

Write, finish, submit, repeat. Old advice, still works. If I get one new release this year, by traditional or independent publishing, I will indeed reach the fifth release goal. With a whole year ahead of me, and a novella in search of a home, this could happen.

We were asked, during the meeting, to make a list of our goals for the year. These should do.

20151214_113536-1_resized

Okay, I made specific writing related ones, too, but it’s been  a rough weekend. Feeling good about these so far.