Lately, I have fallen in love with watercolors. I’m not sure how it happened. Maybe it was part of my resolve to use my stash, but however it happened, I’m in and in deep. Do I know a lot about watercolors? No. Am I especially good at them? Also no. At the moment, I am mostly at the stage of figuring out how it all works, swatching paints, making pretty blobs, and watching endless YouTube videos on palettes and brushes and what sorts of pens work with the medium.

Right now, I am mostly planning on adding watercolors to my journal arsenal. There’s something almost meditative in plopping the colors on the paper and mushing them around. I even like when I flood the page too much for a wet on wet and paint goes places I didn’t intend. This reminds me strongly of writing. It’s alchemical, especially since I serendipitously found out that a book I wanted to read was included in my Spotify plan, so now I can listen to voices read me a story full of emotion and angst and hope, splash colors around and then boom, the next lines for a scene I’d been stuck on slipped in under the fence.

Apparently, I have found something that helps me get where I want to go. Therapy Dude will probably have something to say about that. Probably good things. My educated guess is that being in that space where I am new. where I don’t know all the rules, bypasses the perfectionist in me who, like a character in one of Melva’s and my upcoming books would say, you can’t fail if you don’t play. Technically correct, but not good for the long term.

At the moment, I am filling this journal with things like this. Squares, circles, rectangles. Squiggles on some pages, one turned into a worm or snake (could go either way) and then using the result at the base for more journaling in whatever form feels right at the time. Hopefully about the current WIPs, but we will see. In any case, it needs to be that raw and genuine and focused, but not pressured. Unless that’s pressure. In any case (augh, I said that already) the end product probably won’t look very much like it does at this stage, but I most likely will go back through it, several times, getting something new from it each time.

Sometimes a swatch is just a swatch. Sometimes it is a stepping stone to getting back in the groove. Last night, I put together a small watercolor kit, with a travel palette, water brush, mister bottle, and tiny pad of watercolor paper. I can take it anywhere. I don’t know that I plan on making “real” art (but isn’t all art real?) or sharing it at all, but I do know I want to do it more, and the more I paint, the more stories I want to tell. I call that success.